For all of us, there is a part that does not believe that we are precious just as we are, and certainly not acceptable as we are. This is a result of our conditioning: cultural, familial, and genetic. We learn things like we have to achieve a lot, we have to perform, we have to not make mistakes, we have to be good, we have to be perfect, etc. While good values are extremely important, nobody will ever be perfect. And the more self-love and self-acceptance we have, the better we will naturally behave and perform, not because we have to gain love or acceptance. The feeling that we need to earn it harms our sense of well-being and the health of our behavior. Being freed from that pressure and tension, we can feel better and behave in a more naturally healthy way because of our inherent goodness. The good news is that it is NOT true. Of course, there are many actions that are absolutely unacceptable, but that does not mean that the person is unacceptable. The person is imperfect, wounded, and needs some healing, learning, and often consequences. We are here on this planet to make mistakes and learn from them, constantly evolving. There is no human being who has never made a mistake. So who are we to judge others, or ourselves, so harshly?

Though we are immersed in them and are undoubtedly affected by them, it is not difficult to recognize many of our societal values as far from solid. Just because they are all around us does not mean that we have to agree with them. Examples include: how materialistic our culture is, and how we are constantly invited into “wanting more” or feeling a need to compete with others with our belongings, the huge emphasis on looks and skinniness that makes so many people miserable and even sick, and the “macho man” who feels he can’t show any vulnerable emotions.

It is easier for us to truly believe the truth, feeling the rightness of it in our bodies (knowing it deep down) rather than just as a thought in our heads, when our bodies are relaxed. So in order to enjoy the experience of feeling these liberating truths as true, I invite you into a pleasant experience of focusing on these truths. To do so, allow any type of image that is particularly pleasant for you that invites your body into relaxation to come up. Next, let yourself enjoy being there with all five of your senses. Place your palm on your chest with your attention there, and just let yourself savor the pleasure of your image and of the relaxation in your body. Then allow yourself to absorb the following truths, knowing that if they are unfamiliar, they may at first feel wrong or threatening. But there is nothing dangerous in trusting the truth, even though the foreignness makes it feel threatening. People felt so threatened when Galileo said that the sun was the centre of the universe that he only avoided execution by agreeing to stop teaching this, thought it has always been true. Another part of you that recognizes the truths as true, will feel the pleasure of being welcomed home where you have always belonged.


-You are precious simply because you exist.
-You do not need to earn your worth.
-There is no way that you can lose it.
-Just like peanut butter is peanut buttery and a diamond is shiny, you are precious as an inherent quality.
-Just like an infant does not produce anything of value, and is precious just for existing, so are you. You were once an infant, and have not lost your preciousness.
-Just like an old man dying in a hospital produces nothing but nursing care and yet is still precious, so are you.
-We are not machines, becoming worthless if are not producing for some reason. We are prone to illness and fatigue, and we are here to relax, recreate, connect as well as produce.
Notice how this takes the pressure off, liberating you to be yourself and do your best.
-You deserve compassion, not judgment for your limitations. From a place of self-acceptance, you can constantly strive to improve yourself.
-All human beings are imperfect by definition.

Notice how this takes the pressure off, liberating you to be yourself and do your best.
Because these beliefs may be foreign for a lot of people except perhaps as cognitive beliefs, it is a very good idea to invite yourself often to this place of feeling their truths, so that you can live out of them more and more over time. Neurophysiologically, we know that “Neurons that fire together wire together”, so we need to make the unfamiliar truths feel more familiar just by experiencing them over and over. Also, you will notice that by just hanging out longer focusing on your pleasant image and a truth, the truer and truer it will feel in your body all by itself, without you trying to do anything. This is another good way to facilitate the rewiring of your brain more quickly.


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